Feliz Día del Soltero / Happy Singles Day

Por estas pampas tercermundistas, desde hace unos años tratan de inculcarnos celebraciones importadas.

Around this impoverished thirld world pampas, they (the media?) have been trying for years to force down some imported celebrations on us. As a side note for my North-American and European readers, there's nothing wrong with these celebrations, only that they were unheard of in this country until a few, very few years back. Mostly a commercial thing with no real meaning here. So take it with a grain of salt, yes?

La verdad, me tienen podrida: / To be brutally honest, I'm rotten sick of:

Halloween: jaloqué??? está taaaan de moda en las escuelas privadas bilingües, no gordi?. Tan típica celebración argentina. ¿Habrá disfraz de mazamorrera fantasma?

Haloween: what? Oh yes, it's sooo "in" in all bilingual private schools, right hon? Such a typical argentine celebration. You think there is a ghost mazamorrera (NT: sweet treats street vendor in this country's colonial times) costume to be had?

San Patrick: abrime esa birrita con tapa a rrrosca, HIC!
Saint Patrick: open that beer bottle for me, dear... HIC!

San Valentín: dale, gasta, ché! Aunque sea una tarjetita, una cena, un masaje con óleos aromáticos... pero que sea rojo y tenga forma de corazón. Voy a sugerir a la pizzería de mi barrio que me hagan una de morrones, con formita de corazón. Y la voy a pedir con delivery, a lo mejor me toca un morocho con ganas de festejar.

Valentine Day: oh come on, spend some money, will 'ya? Even if it is just a card, dinner, a perfumed oil massage... whatever, as long as it is red and heart shaped. I'm calling the local pizza joint right now and suggest they bake a red peppers and mozzarella heart shaped pizza. And I'm going to have it delivered to me. With any luck, it's going to be some delivery party boy.

Y ahora, para los que somos solteros no nos quedemos afuera, no nos sintamos abandonados y sobre todo, no nos veamos imposibilitados de gastar nuestros arduamente ganados billetes (monedas no hay, te pago con la tarjetita), nos quieren encajar el Día del Soltero.

Por lo menos el regalo me lo hago yo, con mi propia plata. Como siempre, bah :-)

No sé si invitarme al cine, a bailar...

And now, so that all of us singles do not feel neglected, abandoned and, mostly, prevented to spending our hard earned money, they want us to celebrate Singles Day.

At least I'm spending my money in a gift for myself. Like that's a new one :-)

Mah si, me yo me pongo el disfraz de mazamorrera, me clavo una Quilmes Bock con una de cuore de morrones (porción individual, obvio) y me tejo una mañanita.

Oh f... it. I'll wear my mazamorrera outfit, gulp down a Quilmes Bock and stuff my face on a red peeper heart pizza (single serving, of course) while I knit me this cute shrug.

Tomá.

There you have it.